Ann McKitrick: Hello, and welcome to Parenting in the First Three Years. One of the challenges I had when my kids were babies was finding the time to exercise and take care of myself. We had three little ones in a very short period of time, and I’m guessing it might be the same for you. It really is a catch-22: when you’re so tired, you don’t feel like getting up and exercising, even though you know it will help. But it’s hard to muster the energy when you finally do find a moment to yourself.
You know, my guest today can help you. Desi Bartlett is a women’s health and fitness expert. She has worked with clients like Ashley Tisdale, Alicia Silverstone, Kate Hudson, and many more. Her expertise has been featured on ABC, NBC, Fox, Univision, Hallmark, and Lifetime. She’s the author of Your Strong Sexy Pregnancy and Total Body Beautiful: Secrets to Looking and Feeling Your Best After Age 35. Best of all, she is a lovely person who not only knows a lot about health and fitness, but she’s also figured out practical ways for you to get things done with a baby or toddler in tow. You’re going to love her ideas, and she has so much wisdom to share. So let’s get started.
In the first three years, children grow and learn faster than at any other time in their lives. It’s an amazing transformation. And guess what? Parents do too. I’m Ann McKitrick, the mom of three kids who’s helped hundreds of parents in my 30-plus years in early childhood education. The key to success is understanding not only your child’s development but also your own growth as a parent.
Finding strategies so you can all flourish together. Welcome to Parenting in the First Three Years.
Ann McKitrick: Desi, thank you so much for joining me on the podcast today. I can’t wait to talk about this topic because I love fitness and exercising and all of that stuff. So thanks for being here.
Desi Bartlett: Thank you, Ann. I’m so happy to be here with you and to talk about what I’m really passionate about, which is feeling strong from the inside out.
Ann McKitrick: Great. Why don’t we start by having you tell us a little about yourself as a mom?
Desi Bartlett: Sure! I have two beautiful boys. My older son, Cruz, is 16. He’s taller than me, his voice has dropped, and he’s about to take his driving test this week. My little guy, Rocket, is 10 years old, and he’s just super fun. Like their names indicate, Cruz is chill and calm, while Rocket is a ball of energy.
Ann McKitrick: Those are great names! And Cruz is getting ready to start “cruising” down the road, huh?
Desi Bartlett: Exactly, exactly!
Ann McKitrick: It’s always a little frightening when your child starts driving.
Desi Bartlett: Yes, especially because Cruz will be driving both of them to school! I’ll be holding my breath a little bit, but I trust him.
Ann McKitrick: That’s wonderful. It’s good to let them grow and gain that independence. So tell us more about your work and how it applies to parents with children from birth to three.
Desi Bartlett: I’ve been in the world of yoga and fitness for about 30 years now, completely dedicated to the field. I have a degree in kinesiology and a master’s in corporate fitness. After 25 years out of school, I’m back getting my PhD in kinesiology as well. I’m passionate about empowering women with the tools they need to feel great from the inside out, especially during life transitions—whether that’s fertility, pregnancy, being a new mom, or perimenopause and beyond. I believe that if we can find a little bit of grace during these transitions, it eases those big moments so we can feel calm and strong.
Ann McKitrick: I think every woman listening can relate to that. These transitions sometimes last a long time! What would you say are the links between a person’s mental health and their physical health?
Desi Bartlett: The body and mind are completely interconnected. Unfortunately, our healthcare system tends to separate them. For example, if someone experiences anxiety or depression, we’ll focus on mental health, while physical issues like IBS or sleep disturbances get treated separately. However, these things are often deeply linked. When I speak with women, I notice that if there’s something happening in the body, there’s often an emotional response tied to it. The body communicates with us, asking for attention. A simple way to tune in is by closing your eyes for a minute, taking a deep breath, and asking yourself, “How am I today?”
Ann McKitrick: That’s such an important practice, especially after a rough night with little ones. Many moms can relate to that. I can imagine them sitting with their baby, doing the morning feeding, and taking a moment to practice this. Can they do this with a baby in their arms?
Desi Bartlett: Absolutely. When my older son was born, I meditated a lot while nursing and later while bottle-feeding him. I’d close my eyes, breathe with him, and center myself. He was a breath holder, which can be scary for moms. The first time it happened, I called 911! The baby would hold his breath because of stress, and eventually, he’d pass out. The paramedics explained that it’s a developmental issue with the nervous system. To help him regulate, I’d put him on my chest and slow my breathing, letting him feel my calm, parasympathetic response. Babies mirror our emotions, so they pick up on our calm.
Ann McKitrick: That’s fascinating. I just did a conference session with infant-toddler teachers on this very topic—how we instinctively sway and move with babies, which helps them regulate. It’s amazing how their little bodies sync up with ours, even their sucking rhythms when nursing.
Desi Bartlett: Absolutely. Babies spend 40 weeks inside their mom, so it makes sense that the mom’s system is their favorite. The scent, sound, and feel of their mom are the most familiar things to them.
Ann McKitrick: And even dads and other caregivers can share that rhythm with the baby, right? That’s so sweet. So how do you help moms find time for fitness during these intense first three years, especially with more than one child?
Desi Bartlett: What I hear most from moms is, “When am I supposed to find time to exercise?” I encourage them to exercise with the baby. You don’t need to find an hour and a half to get to the gym. Instead, wear the baby in a carrier, use a jogging stroller, or even incorporate your baby into your exercises. If you’re wearing a 15- to 20-pound baby, you’re getting strong quickly! I like to think that the divine plan doesn’t hand you a 40-pound baby all at once—you grow stronger as the baby grows.
Ann McKitrick: That’s a great point! If you start exercising with your baby early on, you grow stronger as they get heavier. It’s impressive how strong moms become without even realizing it.
Desi Bartlett: Exactly. Think about lifting a car seat with a baby in it—that’s a heavy load. It’s important to use proper lifting mechanics to avoid straining your back. Slowing down, breathing, and using proper form help.
Ann McKitrick: Yes, and all the while you’ve got the diaper bag and maybe a backpack on your back too! So once you move beyond wearing your baby, what’s next? How do you help toddler moms find space in their day, and maybe even get some time away from their child to focus on themselves?
Desi Bartlett: Once your baby becomes a toddler, it changes. Up until about two years old, toddlers will often exercise with you and make it a game. But once they are fully mobile and have their own will, they’re off exploring! At this point, it’s important to carve out time for yourself. If you don’t have help from family or a sitter, find a group of moms and take turns watching the toddlers while others get in a quick workout. You have to get creative, but there are ways to carve out time. Still, one of my favorite exercises is to continue lifting the toddler. If they’re 20 pounds, lifting them overhead gives you strong shoulders!
Ann McKitrick: I go to this exercise class called Camp Gladiator, and we work out at the park. Often, moms will bring their little ones. Depending on the kids’ ages, the moms either use their kids for resistance, or they just let them play with chalk and bubbles while we work out. It’s great because everyone in the class is also keeping an eye on the kids. I love that aspect.
Desi Bartlett: Absolutely. It takes a village, and having a group helps you stay consistent. In exercise science, that’s called “exercise adherence.” Studies show that the number one determinant of sticking to a workout routine is having an appointment—whether it’s with a friend, a class, or a trainer. As women, we often feel responsible for others, but I encourage moms to honor their own time too. If you’ve carved out time for your health and wellness, write it down in your calendar or set a reminder. Treat it like an appointment with yourself.
Ann McKitrick: Absolutely, because if you don’t schedule it, no one else will do it for you! I love that. I watched some of your videos on exercising with babies, and I’d love for you to share more about that with us.
Desi Bartlett: Thank you! I love using babies as resistance instead of weights. It’s also a great way for them to start learning about spatial awareness. One of my favorite exercises is “kiss the baby” push-ups. If your baby is laying on the floor and smiling up at you, you can do push-ups while kissing them each time you lower down. You can also lift the baby overhead and say things like “up, up, up” and “down, down, down,” which helps them learn spatial concepts. And when in doubt, just dance! Hold your baby and dance—around four months, they start to recognize themselves in the mirror, so it’s a fun and developmental activity as well.
Ann McKitrick: That’s wonderful! I know you do a lot of yoga, but what other exercises do you enjoy personally?
Desi Bartlett: I love to lift weights, and I love lifting heavy! Just like with running, there’s something very calming about repetitive, rhythmic movements. It sounds counterintuitive, but lifting heavy things actually calms the nervous system. It reminds me of how strong I am, and if I can do this, I can do anything.
Ann McKitrick: That’s a great mindset. I think we all need to remind ourselves sometimes, “If I can do that, I can do anything.” One time, my friends invited me on a whim to hike the Grand Canyon. I was deep in the thick of parenting, with three kids all around junior high age. I was running about three miles a day at the time, so I thought, “I can do this!” It was tough, but I did it. My husband still says, “You’re so strong, you hiked the Grand Canyon!” That memory always helps me through tough challenges.
Desi Bartlett: I love that! It’s a powerful reminder. Anytime you doubt yourself, you can fall back on that memory: “I hiked the Grand Canyon, I can do this!”
Ann McKitrick: Exactly. It’s something I can always rely on. So, if you were to leave our listeners with one final message or word of encouragement—especially for those new moms who are maybe six to eight months in and need to get up and start moving—what would it be?
Desi Bartlett: My advice would be to call your friends and create a community. Have a mommy group, a circle of women, or even dads who can lift you up and exercise with you. But more importantly, I’d love to remind everyone to remember the words “for now.” Whatever you’re going through—whether your baby isn’t sleeping, they’re teething, or they’re experiencing separation anxiety—just remember, it’s only for now. Parenting is full of transitions, but knowing that this phase is temporary can bring a lot of peace.
Ann McKitrick: That’s exactly right—“for now” is a great mantra. Things won’t always be the way they are today. Thank you so much, Desi, for sharing your wisdom and insight with us. How can people find you and learn more about what you offer?
Desi Bartlett: Thank you so much, Ann. My website is DesiBodyMind.com, where I have a subscription platform for busy parents. You’ll find 20-minute workout videos that include meditation, yoga, and fitness. I’ve also written two books: Your Strong Sexy Pregnancy, which includes Mommy-and-Me workouts, and Total Body Beautiful: Secrets to Looking and Feeling Your Best After Age 35, which focuses on perimenopause and beyond.
Ann McKitrick: Wonderful! I’ll include all the links to Desi’s website and books in the show notes, so be sure to check them out. I know you’re going to love everything Desi has to offer. Thank you again for being here, Desi!
Desi Bartlett: Thank you, Ann. It’s been my pleasure and privilege.